Saturday, 8 March 2008

And I'd like to thank....

25 years ago a rather rotund lady wearing a slightly bizarre uniform called out my name and for the seventh time that day, I made my way up a small set of stairs and onto the stage to receive a certificate of commendation. In my hand I held several other pieces of coloured card, some with the word "Winner" written in capitals, others with "Runner-up" across the top. Now I would have a "Highly Commended" to add to the collection. I looked down from my elevated position onto a room filled with long tables and applauding onlookers, many of them under five feet tall and wearing a variety of stripy neckerchiefs. I was on my way to becoming the most awarded entrant at the Sutton Coldfield District Cub Scout Craft Fair and it felt pretty damned good.

Exiting stage right, I made my way back down to the main floor and stood by one of the long trestle tables which groaned under the weight of over fifty sea-shell sculptures. Further down the table, a collection of blown egg shells painted in various patterns were laid out in perfect rows like soldiers awaiting a royal inspection. Further still was the final category to be awarded - glove puppets, which was basically a bunch of old socks with buttons sewn on for eyes. There, in the front row, was mine: a leg of my mum's tights with two brown buttons, wrapped in a stained white napkin and crowned with a ring of small laurel leaves. Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears. I give you Julius Caesar in 100% pure nylon. For some reason, it didn't win. My hosiery emperor lost out to a recreation of Roland Rat made out of a thick grey walking sock and some fuzzy felt. It was a triumph of pop culture over art but no matter, bagging seven awards had done enough to create a warm feeling of victory, a feeling that I would crave in the years to come.

It was a happy day then, when I opened my email last week and saw that my piece on Chiphenge had been awarded a special prize by the competition host, Michelle from the Greedy Gourmet. She even sent me a little badge to stick on my blog. There are so many foodie challenges happening in the blogosphere that it has inspired me to enter a few more in future and hopefully my entries will prove as popular as the seventh wonder of the carbohydrate world.


Jasmine Rose said...

You should have won!

Anonymous said...

A worthy winner indeed, most entertaining, every word, well done and keep up the good work Chris

Alex said...

Congrats, well deserved!

I think you should try making the Treiffel Tower... or Marble Starch... the list is endless!


Pete said...

Alex, that is a genius idea. I'll have a crack at Pears Rock this weekend. Other suggestions anyone?

Anonymous said...

Couldn't resist joining in on this one... Think you should give the Empire Steak Building, Bread Square and the Leaning Tower of Pizza a go too. And don't forget that timeless British classic, Big Bun.


Anonymous said...

How about:
Sydney Harbour Fudge
Tea and Muffin Square
or even
(Bang)kok au vin
or is that going a little too far